Counting Down the #TrustTips: Daily Tweets on Trust

/5 Comments/in /by

In celebration of the “The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook: A Comprehensive Toolkit for Leading with Trust” a new book written by myself and Andrea Howe in partnership with Wiley Books, we’ve been tweeting a series of Daily Trust Tips.

Andrea and I tweet one #TrustTip per business day, counting down until publication day, October 31. You can access these daily trust tips on Twitter, by using the hashtag (or pound sign) followed by TrustTip. Like this: #TrustTip. You can find us on Twitter at @AndreaPHowe and @CharlesHGreen.

The Tips

We try to stay away from platitudes. They’re meant to be precise and provocative, things you can apply today to enhance your trustworthiness and build stronger, more trusting relationships.

And if that still isn’t enough to motivate you to get on Twitter, we keep a running list of all the #TrustTips right here on our site.

The past two weeks of tips have sparked a good deal of talk on Twitter. Below is the recap of Tips #134-115. You can find the recap of #144-135 here.

Trust Tips Recap: #134– #115

#134: The purchasing agent is your new client. Treat them so. Their needs go beyond beating you up.

#133: If you feel odd about something: notice it. Say it out loud. Talk about it. Trust your gut.

#132: Don’t say what you’ll do, do it. Doing is the best talking. Sell by doing, not by talking.

#131: When you don’t know the answer: say, “I don’t know the answer.” What a concept.

#130: Don’t lie. Don’t fake it. Don’t justify it. Don’t leave things out. Don’t mislead. Don’t lie. Don’t.

#129: Easy way to increase reliability: say you’ll do something—then do it. On time.

#128: Under-promised and over-delivered means you’re lying. Better to do exactly what you said you’d do.

#127: Over a drink, ask your client what (s)he thinks their boss most wants from them.

#126: Dress code: one tiny notch higher than your client—no less, but no more either.

#125: Subscribe to your 2nd biggest customer’s 2nd most important industry trade publication.

#124: Adopt the safest cultural time standard: if you’re on-time, you’re late.

#123: Return calls unbelievably fast. You can wait to get the fix, but return the call unbelievably fast.

#122: Make lots of small promises & consistently follow through.

#121: Announce changes immediately & acknowledge the impact—especially when you won’t deliver as promised.

#120: Don’t just not lie; tell as much truth as possible, except where hurtful to others.

#119: Use pre-meetings; the final meeting should be ceremonial, no surprises.

#118: Identify some of your customers’ unique terminology; if it fits, use it yourself.

#117: Five credentials after your name on the business card is three too many.

#116: Give your meetings goals—not just agendas.

#115: In a meeting, notice who looks like they want to say something. Ask them to do so.

Here are a couple of my favorites:

# 129, Easy way to increase reliability: say you’ll do something—then do it. On time.

How many times have we been reliant on someone to get their job done in order for us to complete ours? It starts in middle school—from home-made science projects—and carries through to our professional lives. Efficient teamwork is part of every successful business. That teamwork extends outside of your office and into your client’s. Your client’s ability to rely on you to get the job done when you say you will makes for a smooth relationship, where no matter what, they feel they can trust you. Reliability is one of the four key factors in the Trust Equation, and one of the key factors we reference in any recommendation.

#116, Give your meetings goals—not just agendas.

Meetings seem to be a way of life when it comes to maintaining a steady business. It’s a practice that we all acknowledge for its necessity but in a way, seem to dread. Why is that? Many times meetings abide by a checklist of items to be discussed but after just thirty minutes minute details start taking over and the overall goals are lost. Creating goals as well as agendas for your meetings allows for the bigger picture to be maintained. It’s important to ensure everyone feels that they aren’t losing valuable time doing something else while they are listening to you veer off course.

#131, When you don’t know the answer: say, “I don’t know the answer.” What a concept.

It is amazing how simple this concept is–yet how few people subscribe to it. One of the quickest ways to reduce your customer’s trust in you is to answer their question incorrectly or to dodge it entirely. The reverse is ironically true as well: if you truthfully answer a question—especially if the answer is, “I don’t know”—they will trust you in that moment, and from then on as well.

Which ones did you find most meaningful?

We’ll be publishing more #TrustTip next week and every week to book publication. Share the wealth; tell others about #TrustTip—new tips posted every weekday at 8:30AM.

 

The Limits of Rational Trust: Part 1

/2 Comments/in /by

The business case for being trustworthy is often extraordinarily pragmatic. Be trustworthy, and in the long run you’ll make more money. The case for this is grounded both in common sense, because people like to do business with those they can trust, and in game theory, which notes that while it’s rational to betray people in short run, if you’re going to run into them again, or into people they may have talked to, well, it’s probably a good idea to act like someone they’d like to do business with, as opposed to someone they don’t trust even as far as they can throw them.

Act trustworthy, which is to say, do what you say you will and take care of the other person’s interests, and it will rebound to your favor.

This works, as Charles H. Green has noted, right up until the point that it’s not rational to act in a trustworthy fashion. If someone is trustworthy only because it’s in their best interests to be so, the second it isn’t worth it, they won’t be. Unfortunately a lot of people are only trustworthy to the extent that it’s good for them, not you.

If you have to deal with such people, and we often do, it’s good to understand exactly what the limits of rational trust are. Rational trust of the game-theory variety breaks down in five main ways:

  • when it’s no longer the long term;
  • when someone can cash out;
  • When you’re not at the table, but on the table;
  • when the social mechanisms of reputation and deterrance break down;
  • when someone has a dominant strategy, something they can force on other people.

Today I want to talk about the first two. In game theory there’s a big difference between games which go on forever, and games which have an end. There comes a point in a person or organizations career or life where there isn’t a long term. Perhaps they’re about to retire. Perhaps they know they have little time to left to live. In economics this often called a “death bet”, which is to say, a bet that by the time the bill arrives, you’ll be dead. If I die owing millions, having lived well, and I don’t care about leaving any heirs money, what exactly did it cost me? If I betray a trust, knowing I’ll never need to do business with that person again, and that whatever they say about them doesn’t matter because I’ll be retired, moved thousands of miles away, or, well, dead, again, there is no cost to me.

The second type of rational untrustworthiness is related to the first. If, by betraying you, someone can make enough money that they don’t need you in the future, then there is no future. They don’t need to worry about their “relationship”, because the relationship with their money is all that matters. The more highly compensated people are, the more this is true. During the housing bubble, huge amounts of mortgage fraud occurred because the participants were making so much money. When, in two to five years someone can make enough money to retire one, if they act ethically only for rational reasons, well, there is no reason to. If the mortgages or CDOs or CDSs are going to blow up after they’ve made as much money as they need to make, then trustworthiness goes out the door. If, on the other hand, they were making a hundred thousand a year and will need the job for 20 years, well, that might matter, but in the short term, fast road to riches environment, it doesn’t.

In both these situations you’ll notice that what has happened is that the social time horizon has gone from long to short. Either way, the person involved no longer needs to worry about the long run, so the rational foundation of trust has gone away. They don’t need to be trustworthy, it no longer benefits them.

Whenever a business or society sets up rewards so that the long run disappears, and all that matters is the short run, people who are trustworthy only because it’s what’s good for them will become less so. Indeed they very likely will become actively untrustworthy. As a client or consumer dealing with people who are rationally trustworthy, you must ask yourself always, “is this person going to keep needing me? If not, do they at least fear me telling other people they are untrustworthy?” If the answer to both questions is no, then you can’t trust them.

I’ll touch on other failures of rational trustworthiness in future posts, for now, the point is simple enough: anyone who’s trustworthy only because they need your future business is no longer trustworthy the second they don’t.

Beyond Work-Life Balance: Bedtime Stories

/6 Comments/in /by

The other night I met Kevin. Kevin is a late forty-something career consultant; for all but a few years of his career, he spent his work-weeks in various cities away from his wife and son.

Yet he and his son are very close. Kevin consciously developed rituals for the two of them and faithfully followed them.

For years, Kevin read books to his son. Every night. Long distance. As he put it:

Every book I’d buy, I’d buy two copies. We went through all the Harry Potter series together, and a ton more.

We had a standing routine. Every night at 7:30PM his time, I’d call him, we’d each open up our copies of the book, and I’d read.

If I was in a hotel, no problem. If I was driving, I’d pull over. If I was driving with a colleague, I’d ask the colleague to drive for half an hour while I read to my son.

It was great. It was a regular thing, a routine; I knew I had his attention, and he had mine. I really enjoyed that time.

How did that work out? Kevin says he has a rich, warm relationship with his son, now 17. I look at the glow in his eyes and his smile when he tells me about it, and I believe him.

Alert! 4 days to deadline for Trust in Business story contest!

/0 Comments/in /by

Alert! Approaching Deadline for Trust in Business story contest is May 13th.

You’ve been part of our blog for so long: now be part of our book!

Thank you to everyone who responded to our call for submission for the Trusted Advisor Fieldbook Story Contest! If you haven’t entered yet, we want to remind you there are just 4 days left to send in your own story about trust in business or organizational life and win great prizes, including publication in the upcoming Trusted Advisor Fieldbook.

Prizes

1. All submissions will be entered in a drawing for a first edition copy of our new book The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook. One book will be awarded for every seven entrants!

2. The top 3-5 stories will be selected for publication in The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook. Authors will receive a full autographed set of all Charlie’s books, plus a first edition copy of the new Trusted Advisor Fieldbook, autographed by co-authors Charles H. Green and Andrea Howe.

3. Honorable Mentions will be featured in the Trust Matters blog.

We recognize that the main reason you’ll contribute is to share your insights with others. We look forward to publishing your story and connecting you with the audience you deserve.

The May 13 deadline is coming up fast. Send your stories in now!

Trust in Business Story Contest Guidelines

1. Deadline: 9PM EST, May 13, 2011

2. Length: 400 words.

3. Theme: Tell us an original story about an experience that you personally had or witnessed, reflecting an aspect of trust in business or organizational life. (No previously published stories, please).

Settings could include (but aren’t limited to):

  • sales,
  • customer relationships
  • internal politics
  • recruiting
  • reputation

Subjects could include (but aren’t limited to):

For examples of the sort of original, first-person stories we’re looking for, see these posts on Trust Matters:

4. How to Submit: Send your story in any digital format to to ahowe at trustedadvisor dot com. We may (probably will) further edit any stories you provide, but we will review those edits with you; we will only publish what you’re comfortable with.